You awakened and felt like you didn’t sleep,
as each attempt to move, caused you intense pain.
Meanwhile, depressing thoughts inside your mind,
made you believe you had gone insane.
You were disheartened by the morning news,
and the absence of shows you usually watched.
When you tried to solve a crossword puzzle,
you saw each answer you wrote was botched.
After you let the dog out in the yard to play,
it crawled under the fence and escaped.
When you ran down the road and searched for it,
you tripped and fell, both knees were scraped.
On the drive to work, your front tire went flat,
when you tried to change it, the jack was fried.
At the service station, you bought a new one,
but five miles down the road, your engine died.
You were late for work, so you were fired,
the secretary you slept with walked away.
When you caught up with her in the hall,
she confessed you had been a terrible lay.
When you returned home, your wife was in bed,
the problem was, she wasn’t sleeping alone.
It seems that she has been having an affair,
with your next door neighbor, Joan.
You packed your bags and went to a hotel,
where you planned on spending the night.
After you check into your deluxe suite,
a homicidal bellman picked a fight.
Your body was on a gurney, inside the squad,
while it raced to the nearest emergency room.
The paramedic shook her head and blurted,
that by the weekend, you would be in the tomb.
A medical team surrounded your body,
while they waited for arrival of the surgeon.
You were falling asleep as a nurse remarked,
it was the doctor’s first operation, he was a virgin.
The next thing you felt, as you opened your eyes,
was a blast of heat, you weren’t feeling well.
Voices around you were announcing proudly,
“Welcome Mr. Loser, to your new home in Hell!”
#poem #poetry #satire #stress #relationship #reality
Poem by David Andre Davison